"I'm falling on my knees, Jesus you're all this heart is living for."
This is my prayer!
Oh, how my mind is full, can't quite keep it all together. Jeremy Camp reminded me of this tonight while I was on the treadmill. This is where I need to be.
Tears over fill my eyes as I am a bit overwhelmed and too consumed. This isn't a pity me blog but its my journal and so therefore I am spilling my heart. I am letting you in, into my heart and mind.
We are missing Casey, our heart is not complete. We are so blessed and thankful to be part of the Express but at the same time reality is hitting me that it is summer time. Which means very few days that we will see each other the next few months. Very few days and very few hours in those days. I mean, I can probably fit them on 2 hands. As Ace gets older this has become harder and harder. Harder for all 3 of us! Its getting harder and harder to miss out on family and friends, their gatherings, birthdays, celebrations, and more... their lives. I know often when I get consumed its my family that takes most of it... Casey and Ace thank you for your unconditional love! And our families, thank you! Thanks for keeping me sane! We rely so heavily on our families and COULD NOT pull this off with out them. We are forever in debt.
My plate is full. A total blessing, Thank You Jesus. However, I need to be reminded to keep my eyes upward on "the prize!" God is so real and so part of everything, all of this. Every good and perfect gift comes from Him. I so needed this tonight, reflection. To slow things down, I've been so consumed and out of it.
I know the devil attacks. Attacks me with worry and the filling up of my schedule. Busy-ness is a weakness of mine. It consumes me. As my mom often reminds me to take it one day at a time, I am trying...
The days are ticking, I am staring at the clock wishing it would slow down. Bandit's season in less than a month. USA try outs in a month. I need to go warp speed, this is on the fore front of my mind. I know I need to be on the mound daily at this point. Lord, my prayer is your will. I need to remind myself of this. You have a plan, I need to follow, with all of me, follow. Many times the Lord has slowed me down, reminding me of why I am here and my purpose. Again, I think/know He is talking to me.
A lot of great things happening, so much to be thankful for. I know I've been avoiding me in my journals, they have been mostly about Ace and Casey. They are what I love to talk about it its easy for me. Its been such a joy to slow down a bit and to be a wife and experience motherhood. I know the Lord has called me to use the platform of softball for Him, at the same time. He will provide, I'm looking to him to help pull this off.
So, I will let you in on a few fun/stressful blessings on the rise. Please notice fun is first, way ahead of the stress part. All such a blessing.
-My Camps, we put on with a host, Jennie Finch Softball Camps, across the country. We have 420 girls for this weekend in Oklahoma. Praise God, the glory is His! We have 6 dates for this fall that will be posted next week. 6 dates... 6 states, 6 stops! Awesome! This was a vision God gave me/us (my family, amazing family) and by His grace it has become a reality!
-Planning/Preparing to film a pitching DVD. This is so over due. However, I trust the Lord is at work and its His timing. Perfect timing! I can't wait to share this with the softball world and have it available come this summer.
-Diamond Nation, Jennie Finch Softball Academy partnering with Jack Cust Baseball Academy in Flemington, New Jersey. There are great people leading the way to the opening. A lot of work needs to be done to get it where we need it to be, we will get there. Exciting stuff, making softball year around in Jersey!
-Revamping of my website! So fun! Can't wait to show you all the final product. We've hired an amazing company to update and relaunch my website. Keep checking, www.JennieFinch.com
-Bandits Season, so excited! Can't wait to get back to Chicago, in pants (love our uni's)! Looking forward to being apart of an amazing team and league!
-USA Softball, always a complete honor.
-Teaming up with the charity nPlay
-Check out the cool stuff at WePlay.com, and register your team!
-Excited for the invite to play in the MLB All Star Celebrity Softball Game in St Louis in July!
Lots of incredible things happening! All this summer, more like next month.
Hopefully to top it all off come October we will get word that Softball will be back in the Olympics for 2016!!!
All of this is just stuff, blessings but stuff. Lord you again reminded me of this is so much bigger than me. Enough of stress and enough of me. You humbled me again, again I lean on you in prayer.
My final prayer...
I was just notified this week of yet another softballer Ms. Hannah, facing cancer. She was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and is only 10 years old. I want to ask you all to keep Ms. Hannah in your prayers as she battles this terrible disease! We are all rooting for you Hannah!
Lord, Thank You for speaking to me tonight. A weight is lifted off my chest, up to you. Take it all, its all yours. I'm falling on my knees, offering you all of me! Give Hannah the strength and courage to fight and conquer this horrible disease!
By His Grace & His will,
Dreaming & Believing in Him,